Why We Miss Deception — The Hidden Problem Part 1

Most people believe they can tell when someone is lying. They watch closely, listen carefully, and trust their instincts. There is a quiet confidence in that belief, the sense that, with enough attention, the truth will reveal itself.

And yet, in real life, deception is missed far more often than we realize.

The problem is not that people are not paying attention. The problem is how they are paying attention.

In most conversations, people tend to separate what they see from what they hear. Some focus on body language—facial expressions, posture, gestures—believing that behavior reveals the truth. Others focus on speech—tone, pauses, choice of words—believing that language holds the answer.

Both approaches feel logical. Both seem sufficient. But both are incomplete.

Deception does not present itself in neat, isolated signals. It does not wait patiently to be analyzed. It appears in brief, overlapping moments. A hesitation in speech that coincides with a tightening of the face, a confident statement delivered with a subtle physical withdrawal, a detailed explanation paired with emotional inconsistency.

These signals do not occur one after another. They occur together, often within seconds.

And that is precisely why they are missed.

Most people observe first and listen later, or listen first and observe later. By the time they shift their attention, the moment where meaning existed has already passed. What remains is only a partial impression, one that feels complete, but is not.

So they walk away confident in their judgment.

"He looked honest." OR  "She sounded convincing."

But rarely do they ask the most important question: "Did what I saw match what I heard?"

That question is where real observation begins.

In Part 2, we will look at the biggest mistake people make when trying to detect deception.

Durian Tunggal: Malaysia’s Wake-Up Call for Real Police Training Reform

When poor training turns fatal, the nation pays the price.

The killing of three civilians in Durian Tunggal, Melaka—including a 21-year-old with no criminal record—has forced Malaysia to confront a painful truth: when police officers are inadequately trained, tragedy becomes inevitable.

Police initially claimed there was an “attack” and "self-defense". Yet a 13-minute audio recording—captured live by the wife of one of the victims—reveals a starkly different story. The young men are heard fully complying with police commands. One officer orders, “duduk,” and the suspect calmly replies, “Ya bang.” There is no shouting, no fighting, no threat—only obedience. Moments later, gunshots erupt.

Post-mortem reports reportedly show bullet entry angles from above—consistent with the victims being forced to squat or kneel. If true, this directly contradicts the police narrative and points to a catastrophic collapse of professionalism, judgment, truth, and discipline.

This was not merely misconduct.

This was a failure of training.

The Real Problem: Training, Not Just Tactics

Proper policing requires far more than knowing how to pull a trigger. It demands emotional control, legal understanding, communication skills, and the ability to de-escalate conflict with confidence and clarity.

When officers lack these competencies, they become reactive, fearful, and prone to unnecessary and brutal force. Good training builds confidence, honesty, and discipline. Poor training breeds insecurity—and insecurity becomes brutality, and brutality leads to lying through the teeth.

As scripture teaches: “Man shall not live on bread alone, but by every word that strengthens and enlightens the mind.”

Similarly, officers cannot rely on weapons alone—they must be nourished by discipline, knowledge, and moral grounding to develop character and integrity.

Even Tamil cinema reflects this timeless truth. The legendary MGR famously sang: “Don’t sharpen your knife… sharpen your mind.”

A reminder that true strength comes not from weapons, but from wisdom, clarity, and training.

Another classic Tamil lyric warns: “Don’t trust your eyes—they can deceive you. Trust all your senses, especially your trained mind.”

These teachings—whether from scriptures, song, or philosophy—carry one message: The mind must be disciplined and trained above all else.

Training The Mind: The Key to Preventing Tragedy

When police officers lack proper training of the mind, they often fall into unwise and reactionary behaviors. Training is not merely about procedures—it is about strengthening the human mind.

Officers must accept a simple truth: criminals will commit crimes. The role of law enforcement is to prevent, interrupt, and bring justice through skill and knowledge, not emotion.

A well-trained police officer is a thinking officer. Regular training sharpens analytical abilities, builds confidence, and nurtures professional pride. Such officers stay one step ahead of criminals, using knowledge, observation, and strategy to outsmart them. They succeed with integrity, fulfilling their duty honorably.

In contrast, untrained or poorly trained officers feel overwhelmed and insecure, fueling the dictum that an idle mind is a devil's workshop. They grow frustrated, lose motivation, and become emotionally unstable most of the time. Feeling threatened and lacking mental discipline, they rely on shortcuts born from fear, anger, impatience, and helplessness.

When these emotions dominate, some begin to justify the unjustifiable: excessive and even lethal force against suspects they find “irritating.” This is not justice, but uncontrolled hatred, anxiety, and desperation leading to unholy justification.

What Malaysia Must Do Now

To prevent another tragedy like Durian Tunggal, Malaysia must urgently overhaul police training and culture. This means:

• Implementing regular full-spectrum police trainings that include de-escalation techniques, emotional intelligence, legal procedure, and communication mastery.
• Introducing continuous retraining programs rather than one-off seminars.
• Mandating body cameras and strict evidence-handling protocols to ensure transparency.
• Establishing independent oversight bodies to end internal cover-ups and protect the integrity of investigations.
• Holding officers fully accountable for violations of law and breaches of public trust.

Durian Tunggal must not fade into yesterday’s news. It must become the turning point that forces Malaysia to rebuild a police force worthy of public confidence.

Malaysians deserve officers who protect—not officers who kill out of fear, frustration, or inadequate training.

By Jackson Yogarajah

Deception Detection Expert • Former Special Branch Trainer • Author of A TO Z About Body Language • Founder of the OWLS Method of Detecting Deception.

 

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It was great connecting with professionals from around the world, exchanging ideas, stories, and insights. I also had the chance to share the second edition of my book with some interested attendees, which made the event even more special.

Grateful for the meaningful conversations and new connections made. Looking forward to seeing where these collaborations lead!

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Acknowledgment Letter from Amity International School Amsterdam

Honoured to receive this kind acknowledgment from Amity International School Amsterdam for my recent guest session with their senior students on Understanding Body Language and Communication.

It's always a privilege to engage with young minds—especially on skills that are essential not only in school, but in life, leadership, and the workplace.

Grateful for the opportunity and thoughtful hospitality.

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